Sunday, June 19, 2011

there's a science to fear.

It's 19th June and for the first time in ever, I am actually bored. Like, I literally have nothing to do bored. Problem is, I no longer know what to do when I'm bored. Come to think of it, if I knew what to do then, I wouldn't be bored. Right. Aaaand for the first time since never, I'm listening to songs on shuffle which I have never done before. It's actually interesting to put everything on the iPod in shuffle because you won't know what's next and I have to keep refraining myself from stop going into shuffle and listen to a particular album like I always do. Imma be on shuffle tonight. For now it's Ellie Goulding's cover of the Temper Trap's Sweet Disposition. I'm willing to bet that I'm the only one who thinks it's so much more raw than the original version.

Then again, everyone sounds better live. Unless they're talentless, of course.

Okay, couldn't resist myself. It's on repeat now.

Exam's long over and I didn't feel good about the results.  Heck, when have I ever felt good about any exam. Oh wait, remember that time back when you were like, 14 and you felt good about it? Yeah, let's not dwell on that. Never mind that I just realized (and yes, it took me almost 16 years to figure this out) that I can't slum it anymore and still expect to get more than 90. Nor can I flip through the book recklessly 30 minutes before the exam and remember the whole thing. Nor can I sing a song and choose the selection that my finger hovered over on the last phrase of the song.

It took me 16 years to discover that a string of As won't start pouring down like rain. What have I been doing for the past 10 years of school? Yeah, not so much of learning ain't it? I have no clue how I obtained A's during my PMR. I mean, like, when the hell did I ever actually read and memorize things from the book because as far as I know, school books and I have been having the same issues since I was 10. My complete inability to absorb words from the textbook or even look at it for more than thirteen minutes before being distracted by something that wasn't even remotely interesting like Solitaire, of course.

The lesson here is, always always always study. So, I have a few words of wisdom for myself. That's what you get, bitch for not studying, not paying attention, not sending in or even bother to do your homework, not giving a fuck about world history, oh, and not quadraple checking because giiirrrll, you made so many little mistakes that you erased but forgot to write when you left it to dry.

Oh, wait. And another lesson is don't even bother trying to be creative or even mad quirky in your English essay (in fact, don't even put effort) because hell, the teacher ain't even reading what you wrote. Who cares that you just wrote one of the quirkiest stories with the coolest puns and of course, memorable quotes from Scott Pilgrim and How I Met Your Mother and Nick and Norah? Who cares that you were abso- fucking- lutely was inspired by Shopaholic's little gig at the boutique in the Secret Dream World of Shopaholic and Aubrey Plaza's character Julie's IDGAF attitude to customers in Scott Pilgrim? Never mind that you were oh- so- completely immersed in your writing that you had a whole movie thought of based on your story. Oh, did I mention that you had a soundtrack so amazing and so mind- blowing in mind, you yourself would pay a hard RM 50 for the soundtrack? No? Well, now I did. Did I mention that you just spent an hour writing until your hand turned numb but you didn't care because it was gonna kick ass but all you got was a measly 42/ 50 for it while you had an impeccable grammar and sophisticated vocabulary that was admired by your former English tutor and one of the guys whose opinion, experience and creativity you admire and respect. Oh, and the boy who had the worst writing, dullest storyline with no sense of plot and was anti- climatic, couldn't even spell 'succeed' to save his life nor could he form ten consecutive sentences that was gramatically correct got highest for English and problem is, you know he didn't score that much on the other sections either.

If that's how you're going to mark the papers (mindless points instead of creativity and language and of course, obeying the law of plots), I might as well toss my dreams of trying to pursue the title of being one of the best writers around which I had since I wrote an essay of a 'gangster boy' with an adorable, adolescent crush on a pretty girl. I might as well quit being in English class altogether if my efforts was being so unrecognized. Hell, I might as well need to write a standard 4's standard of essay in order to actually obtain marks that is more than average. Excellent, in fact. Long gone are the days where my essays were actually being read and commented on. Oh, how I miss you Pn. Shahrizad!

Current Location: Maharaja Lawak Land. Aaaah, so funnyyyy, me likey :D
Current Mood: Don't even care, whatever.
Current Song: I'm watching Maharaja Lawak, acane tu?